Strength in Vulnerability
When we were little boys, we would have no problem asking for help. There was no shame in it. You identified a problem, had a mother or father there to assist and felt confident that needing help was ok.
As we grew into men it became less fashionable or popular to ask for help or to show any emotion at all. By doing this we believed it was a sign of weakness. We were conditioned to grow up being tough. Told not to cry and to handle problems like a man. As men we are protectors, providers, hunters, and gatherers. We don’t ask for directions and we don’t need instructions. We certainly don’t need any help. Right?
This kind of thinking is dangerous and so far from what God desires for our lives. As men we often live in a state of silent frustration. Holding things in, bottling them up. May seem harmless enough but, this behavior can lead to stress, depression, heart disease, substance abuse and even suicide. We feel like it is more noble to suffer in silence rather than bring others down with our issues.
The truth is, showing vulnerability, opening to people, and asking for help is honoring God. Let me show you what I mean.
God created us with a need for help. Asking for help is not admitting failure but recognizing how God made us. Even in the beginning. God provided everything for Adam but instead of having him be self-sufficient God designed Adam to have help in the form of Eve. In Genesis 2:18 it says, “It is not good for man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him”. Needing and providing help was first introduced by God so it can not be seen as shameful.
Often, we believe that we don’t want to bother other people with our “stuff” … Everyone is dealing with their own situations… No one has time to worry about what I am going through… God wants us to help each other in times of trouble, hardship, lack or need. We as Christians are a body of believers with different gifts and strengths. The Bible commands us to: “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ” (Galatians 6:2). We are giving glory to God when we share our burdens and provide someone an opportunity to exercise their God-given gifts and share the love of Christ with us.
At the end of the day the facts are that we do sometimes fail, we do get weak, we are needy, and we do struggle with issues. Although it may be embarrassing and even painful to acknowledge this truth, we must believe that God will never shame us for admitting it. Not being willing to admit our weakness and ask for help is more a sign of rebellion rather than submission that God requires from us. The Bible says in Corinthians 12:9 “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness”.
Gods plan for us in times of need is clear. He has a strong desire to cover us with his grace and help. Not only does He show his own compassion but, He also provides a body of believers gifted in different areas to care for each other. We don’t have to give in to isolation and pride while we are dealing with our own heavy burdens. God has designed us to need help and we honor him by asking for it.